The Violet Hour in Wicker Park.

This hidden gem has a dark, trendy atmosphere that is sure to promise for a pleasant evening.  Even if you might confuse yourself for being in a giant game of Tetris (the high backed leather chairs look like “L’ pieces and all tables are small perfect squares), the drinks are impeccable and the intimacy is just right.

While I wouldn’t say this is an unknown spot from reading the crowd, it’s for sure a good place to stop by for a quiet evening of getting to know you.

The Violet Hour – 1520 N Damen Ave

This is a hilarious video from the 80’s with online dating videos.  I don’t understand how some of these people can say this stuff with a straight face.  Maybe it’s the radical mustache or the bodacious hair that gives them the sharp intellect to spout off favorites like “I’m a 25 year subscriber to Playboy” and “I consider myself a refined valley dude.”

“Hi Mom!”

Do you have your costume yet?

If not, here are some places you can hit last minute to throw something together.

Salvation Army Thrift Store – 2270 N Clybourn Ave, Chicago, IL‎

Always full of the most random pieces of clothing and accessories, this is a great place to hit up that won’t break the bank.  If you are going to go here, make sure you have a reasonable plan of what kind of costume you want.  There are so many types of clothes and strange items, your head will be spinning and you’ll feel like you’ve walked into a life-size version of that old smelly box full of random crap in your parents basement. 

Ragstock – 812 W Belmont Ave, Chicago, IL‎

Ragstock is great for looking for vintage clothes.  With 70’s, 80’s, and funky clothes, you’ll be able to put together a solid costume in no time.  They have a large variety of clothes and it is reasonably well organized, so you don’t have to hunt and peck as you would at a Salvation Army store.

Halloween Hallway – 222 S Wabash Ave (more locations)

This is your spot for your set holiday costumes.  You can take a stroll through here and get a bunch of different ideas for what you want to become for the night.  Especially good for those who are heading to a party Saturday night, but have NO clue what they want to be.  Walk in, purchase costume, walk out, wipe hands on pants.  Simple.

If you have any other places for costumes that could help out your fellow Chicagoans, let us know in the comments!

Happy Halloween!

Enter: The Phase Out

The phase out occurs when you gradually remove this person from your life.  Like a dying heartbeat, the tempo and rhythm of the short lived relationship pace themselves slower and slower.  Text messages become ‘no-response’ statements instead of questions and phone calls become a rare gem.  While there is nothing you can do on the receiving end of a phase out (dust yourself off kid and get back out there!), there are a couple keys when implementing it so you don’t come off as a complete jerk (or bitch).

1. Have a plan – Once you decide that watching paint dry is more entertaining than this person, commence the phase out and stick to it.  Start hitting the brakes and slow that train down.
2. Keep it gradual - Slow and steady wins the race (or in this case, douses the flame).  Draw out the texts and ease up on the calls.  Baby steps.
3. Avoid weekend dates – If you’re going to hang out, hang out during the week.  Weekends are prime real-estate, and you don’t want to play with fire after drinking… which leads to…
4. Don’t have a sleep over – This just resets the clock at zero.  Everytime you get it on between the sheets, it sends a signal to the other person you’re in it to win it.
5. Axe the late night calls and drunk texts – “What you up to?” at 2am isn’t as innocent as your drunk mind convinces you.  Have a little restraint or else you’re back at square one and just extending the phase out.

Whatever your opinion of the phase out might be, it’s still a tactic that is used in the streets of Chicago and many other cities around the globe.  Do you phase out?  Have you been phased out?  Share your thoughts in the comment section!

“745 Ways to please your man’ (really?), ‘Where to meet your man” (hey, how about EVERYWHERE), ‘4,354 Ways to tell if he’s into you’, etc, etc…

So I found this article on Cracked.com that picked out 7 sex tips from Cosmo that will put you in a hospital’.

Please ladies, DON’T do any of these…

1. Bite the Family Jewels – Self explanatory… they’re not seeded grapes.
2. Shake His Nuts – I really don’t think it’s going to help bring the rain.
3. Yank His Crotch Hair – You yank.  And I’ll yank.
4. Give Him a Sneezegasm – Keep the black pepper where it belongs… in the kitchen.
5. Milk His Cow – What’s good for the cows, is NOT good for the guys.
6. Go Joystick On His Boner – This isn’t asteroids.  Hit the wrong button and you could trigger an accidental roundhouse kick.
7. Put Him in the Fucking Hospital – This one said to basically GIVE HIM AN INDIAN BURN down there.  Don’t!

You can see the original article here

Here’s the part that threw me off my game.  The past few weeks while I’ve been out, I’ve had two girls walk up to me and say “Want to buy me a drink?”.  Personally, the first thought that goes through my head is “Are you serious?  Get lost lady.”  Do guys actually fall for this?  No matter how attractive or unattractive the girl is in this situation, I find it to be completely obnoxious and she’s thrown all credibility out of the window faster than a starving fat kid devouring chocolate cake.

If I were going to buy a girl a drink, it would be after we’d been talking for awhile and there is obvious chemistry or solid conversation.

Ladies, do you actually see any success with this?  Or are these ladies just crazy?

Share your thoughts in the comments!

Best line: “I deserve love like everyone else! I dont need to rummage through the dumpster for a playboy!!!!!!”

While this is a fake video, I wouldn’t be shocked to see some people actually do this.  Seen any that are too good to not share?  Send them over or post them in the comment section!

National Singles Week was started in Ohio back in 1984 to appreciate and acknowledge the growing number of unmarried Americans, who are now 96 million strong, or 43 percent of the U.S. population age 15 or older, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

I’ll just consider it the opposite of Valentine’s day.  For all those singles out there who feel that twinge of envy when their coupled counterparts are celebrating on that red velvet night, now’s our turn to rock out.

The only thing is, we get a WEEK instead of a single night.

So break out the party streamers and the secret booze you keep hidden in your drawer at work.  It’s time for a celebration.

I’ve combed through and found some good places to hit for happy hour each night so you can go hang out with that support group of yours and soak in your freedom.

Monday –

Cubs viewing party at Mother Hubbard’s

Mother Hubbard’s Sports Pub – 5 W. Hubbard St. – Chicago (River North)

Get half-price pizzas with the purchase of a Miller bucket, plus complimentary chicken wings when you buy a Newcastle pitcher during Cubs game days.

Tuesday -

$5 Happy Hour at Bull & Bear

Bull and Bear Bar – 431 N. Wells – Chicago, IL 60654 – 312-527-5073

Amission Includes:
Open Bar from 6-7pm(Beer and Wine)
Giveaways

$5 in Advance
$10 at the Door

Wednesday –

Doggy Happy Hour

When: Wednesdays : 5 p.m. – 9 p.m.
Price: No cover  http://www.joesbar.com

Have drinks with your pooch on the patio. Each week, a different vendor, shelter, boutique or other dog-related group attends. Drink specials include $5 vodka lemonades and $5 Coors Light pitchers, plus water bowls for dogs.

Thursday –

Sidebar Grille – 221 N LaSalle Street – Chicago, IL 60601 – (312) 739-3900

3:00 PM – 10:00 PM – 22oz drafts for price of an 18oz draft, $2 sliders and $5 wings

Friday –

Gaslight Bar and Grille – 2426 North Racine, Chicago, IL 60614 – (773) 929-7759

5:00 PM – 2:00 AM – $3 So-Co lime shots, $5 Sofia champagne cans, $15 Miller Lite buckets

Kick up the ‘let’s have some fun’ drive and have a great week!

I received this forward the other day and it’s too funny not to share.  This was apparently written by little kids (and my thoughts).

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

“You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.”

• Alan, age 10 (don’t forget beer pal)

“No person really decides before they grow up who they’re going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you’re stuck with.”

• Kristen, age 10 (my dating a religious person article is for you)

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

“Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.”

• Camille, age 10

“No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.”

• Freddie, age 6 (have fun at that star trek convention)

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

“You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.”

• Derrick, age 8

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

“Both don’t want any more kids.”

• Lori, age 8 (that’s your fault princess)

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

“Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.”

• Lynnette, age 8 (you mean if you stop talking long enough)

“On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.”

• Martin, age 10  (you are going to be fine kid…)

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

“I’d run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.”

• Craig, age 9 (I should add that to my ending a bad date list)

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

“When they’re rich.”

• Pam, age 7 (*cough*gold digger*cough*)

“The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn’t want to mess with that.”

• Curt, age 7

“The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It’s the right thing to do.”

• Howard, age 8   (can you say “child support”?)

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

“It’s better for girls to be single but not for boys.  Boys need someone to clean up after them.”

• Anita, age 9  (slut)

WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN’T GET MARRIED?

“There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn’t there?”

• Kelvin, age 8

And the #1 Favorite is……..

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

“Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.”

• Ricky, age 10  (I couldn’t have said it better myself)

Occasionally these lost souls have a way of coming back from the past to once again appear in that Recent Call list.  A friend recently asked me what it means when a guy she used to date or “hang out” with contacts you after a long period of radio silence.

That random phone call can have a few different meanings behind it.  A lot can be told by the time the call was placed.  For ease of consumption, let’s just throw them into two different categories.

The ‘Before 10PM’ and ‘After 10PM’ phone call.

The Before 10PM calls are usually innocent.  And by innocent I mean being just a call to catch up and see how life is rolling along or just a last ditch effort to try to genuinely rekindle the flames (which ticket was punched and departed w/the Titanic).  Who knows, maybe they want to venture down that road to being your ­opposite sex friend­.  Scrabble anyone?

The After 10PM calls are 95% all of one variety…  a late night stab in the dark to see if you want to play catch up on some old time fun.  Yes, I mean the infamous ‘booty-call’.

Your head may initially be in mass hysteria thinking ‘WTF?’, but this is the truth from everyone that I’ve conferred with about the verdict of this trial.  Usually this call is sparked by an emotional power outage from a bad breakup, one too many nights listening to Blister in the Sun by their lonesome, or that effervescent beverage known to all as alcohol.

Know the rules of engagement when fielding one of these potential ‘re-run’ calls.  Knowing the situation before you answer will always give you the upper hand.  Hang on a sec… my phone is ringing…