Living in the city has some great perks.  We have the beach at a stone’s throw, festivals to fancy anyone’s delight, and different nightlife activities to cater to even the unique of circles.

This leads to meeting many different kinds of people… tall, short, strange, beautiful, different races, religions, ethnicities, and so on…  Which helps us create a mental checklist of things we want and don’t want in a potential partner.

Straddling the line of staying in the game and being kicked to the curb, lies the deal-breakers.  With so many options, which breakers are valid, and which are part of your own neurosis?

The Core Checklist

These are the mainstay of your livelihood.  Whether its religion, family values, or perhaps even race, nothing is going to shake the roots of this tree.  Keep these values strong and do your best not to waver from them.  Dating is hard enough as it is without having huge looming back-breakers tracing your mind on a daily basis.

Even though one could be open minded, both parties must have their heads and hearts open in order for this to have a shot.

If she’s a hardcore Catholic, and he’s a practicing Muslim, realize that both of you aren’t going to be praying to the same forces when the Cubs are down by a run.  Like the wailing baby on an airplane, the core checklist is difficult to ignore, even if you blast your Ipod, you’re still killing your ear-drums.

The Adaptables

So she doesn’t like the savoring glory that is Taco Bell, and he’s Big Foot’s long lost cousin with that sweater he calls hair.  While these tribulations may be more annoying than the old lady’s purse that’s digging into your side on a packed El to work, you have to learn to let it sliiiiiiiide!  Give the situation a second glance before you execute your decision to kick them out the door.

Adaptables are called such because you can adapt to them!  Ease up and you may find that even if she’s a valley girl who says ‘like’ every other word, and he has excessively sweaty palms, that good could outweigh the bad.

You could even get used to it and find it to be one of the things you really enjoy about the other person.

The X-factors

“His nose hairs are scraping my face when we kiss.”

“She wears so much makeup, I feel like I’m dating Bozo the clown’s daughter.”

Neither of you are perfect, get over it.  The X-factors are the little things that can be adjusted over time.  While they may be glaring problems to kick it off, they’re usually more problems in your head than they are in reality.  If they chew with their mouth open, a disguised joke saying that food looks better after they’ve chewed it, and boom… problem solved.

Deal-breakers will always be part of the dating arena.  It’s a huge multi-headed beast which you must face on your journey.  If you don’t realize you’re being overdramatic, you could find yourself in a boat alone; missing that perfect soul that may exist… but is just a little disguised.