Too much stress, not enough time. Work, busy schedule, failed relationships, summer heat, and a thousand other reasons can get you in this mindset: at the moment, you’re just not cut out for the full time relationship.

Unfortunately, this doesn’t turn off the endless faucet of sexual desire. So what’s a civilized person to do?

Pull out that trusty cell phone and start drunk dialing old flames?   Not if you want to wake up the next morning feeling as if you opened Pandora’s Box to accompany that all too familiar “I’m never drinking again” headache.

The ultimate desire in this situation would be the perfect script… a no strings attached buddy… Aka. A friend with benefits.  Is it possible?  Let’s find out…

A no strings affair is simple in theory: all the “fun” parts of the relationship, without the ins, outs, intricacies, and efforts involved in the party of two.  With any relationship, there are feelings that go back and forth.  Simply put, the relationship ends when the feelings aren’t reciprocated by both parties.

The problem with taking a crack at one of these ‘buddy’ situations is that almost every time, one party has stronger feelings than the other.  That becomes leading someone on… which induces hurt feelings… which can potentially create psychos.  No one wants a psycho.

A couple ground rules if you are thinking about giving this a shot.  If you’ve never hooked up and have been friends for a long time, chances are messing around will ruin the relationship.  Same goes for a relationship that is in and out of dating and breaking up.  The situation might be ripe for the picking if there was one short lived relationship (both parties must be comfortable with each other) and both have a real understanding that they are truly not meant for each other.

Be open and honest and make sure that all expectations are discussed before you try closing on the deal.  Realize that a no strings arrangement is a ticking time bomb ready to go off at any moment;  the party could end just as quickly as it started.  It will be short-lived, for either party could potentially find another person to seriously date at any time.  Enjoy the moment for what it is and once it ends… like that comfy pair of underwear with holes in it… just let it go.

There it is… it can be done.  Just heed those warning signs of feelings and make sure both parties are honest about intentions and clear for take off (pun intended!).  Isn’t that what a hot summer in Chicago’s all about anyway?